A: It sounds as if you have been hurt a lot in the past. What exactly do you mean by a 'nice man'? Does it mean one who is looking for a committed monogamous relationship?

Perhaps trying to find this sort of man in a bar is part of your problem. Many people - both men and women look at visiting bars as a fun, no strings attached activity. Men hope to find a woman who is as equally excited as themselves by the prospect of an exciting one night stand. Whilst not rejecting out of hand a man met in a bar, some careful enquiry as to his marital status and what he is looking for may help you sort the wheat from the chaff! Going to bars is fun and a buzz, but it may not be the best place to meet someone with whom you can have a long term relationship.

What are your other options? Through work, friends, joining a society of like-minded people, internet dating, pursuing an interest, taking classes or joining a club. It is important to keep an open mind. Don’t dismiss the idea of joining a history society because you think all the male members will be fat, bald, anorak wearing nerds!

Remember, the happier you are within yourself and the more self-sufficient you seem the more attractive you will appear.

Best of Luck!